College Life

in the past months... a whole latuvah things happened...
I just can't blog a lengthy one right now... too busy... (which is why I haven't blogged in months)
among other things... I want to learn photoshop...
Which I'll do when I finally get the chance...

other than this I bid thee my blog space adieu...

"I shall return"

Its a LITTLE late, but its never too late... ;))

Well its been awhile...
sorry about the previous "EMO" blog... ^_^'
I do feel a whole lot better, knowing that I got nothing to hide anymore... XD

anyway, I felt it was time I gave a message to my HS "bedan" friends... (I don't expect everyone or anyone to read this, but it does flatter me that you do... :D)

Raymund - Mon, Mon-mon, Mamon, Peña, so many names pare! 4years of transformation, from "totoy" days to "mukhang-mature-na-daw" (DAW! mukha lang! XD) tnx...

Jairo - although in doubt parin tayo kung papano nag simula friendship natin, that doesn't matter because we did lots of fun things with raymund and joshua... thank you for choosing us as your friends!

Joshua - Grabe ang tagal na nating friends... since 1st year pa! til now we still got each others backs... and lets always keep it that way allright? tnx!

Early - Thank You! thank you for listening to me a long long long time ago! dahil dun naging trusted friend kita... and til now, never nawala kabaitan mo sakin... thank you sa advice... THE TOLERANCE through both good times and bad times, no regrets kasi nakilala kita... THANK YOU TALAGA!

Coleen - ISA KA PA! THANK YOU! paano tayo naging friends? ewan... parehas kayo ni jairo, di ko alam paano tayo naging friends! or nalimutan ko! either way, THANK YOU! thank you for saving my ass a whole lot of times the past 2 years! thank you for the advice, the listening, the surprisingly heavy slams on the back!? (keep working on your aim! XD)

Hanna - Busmate... blessing in disguise man yung accidental na pagiging late mo sa beda, which lead to you becoming my busmate... naging blessing ka din sa buhay ko... ;)) haha! tnx, you have changed my standards of "taong may sayad" kung di sila kasing baliw mo, normal lang sila... :P
tnx you're a very tolerant person most would've stopped talking to me to spare themselves the annoyance I cause, pero you're one of the few na kausap ko lage, tnx for filling in those lonely traveling hours... :)) and paramdam ka naman, buhay pa ako! XD

Sarah - My groupmate in most of our group activities in 4th year... thank you sa times na pagiging honest and patient sakin, di na ako pinagsawa sa mukha mo noh?!? XD through all those group activities natutunan ko na lage ka talagang ma aasahan... THANK YOU!

Zil - busmate, schoolmate, TKD mate, at kung ano-ano pang mate, tnx at binibigyan mo ako ng kung ano-anong mga trip, ikaw nagturo sakin kung paano maging "walang-hiya!" alam mo na yun... XD TNX!

Camille F. - oo we just met nga a few months back, pero feel ko 2 years na din kitang kasama... friend tnx sa pagkinig sa mga storya ko... grabe nagiging madaldal ako dahil sayo! TNX!

Monica - MOCCA! OLD SEATMATE! tnx sa sanctuary dati ah... tnx sa pagiging open-loyal friend...

Pumpsquad/PSP central (AKA barkada na naka upo sa gitna ng canteen sa likod ng patok na noodle shop! XD)
(Paopao, Lenard, Gab, Raffy, Enzo, Joseph, Raymund, Jairo, Joshua)
- guys thanks for the times na kumain tayo at one table, and gumagawa ng kung ano-anong kalokohan (mapa PSP, anime, sound trip, foodtrip, trip-trip, and kung ano-ano pang trip)
the sharing, the advice, the lessons... basta tnx guys...

Physci 2010 - Physci friends, tnx for the 2 wonderful HS years, far better than my other 2 years... (nuff said... XD) OHANA! *ohana means family, family means no one gets left behind... ;))


dahil wandering loner ako THANK YOU din sa Gazeebo people, Lounge cru, Pastries, Trufflez(?), and all the other wonderful people and barkadas na na meet ko... tnx sa makulay na HS...


Ngayon, I still have no idea whether BS Physics with Material Science and Engineering ako sa ADMU or BS Mechanical Engineering ako sa DLSU... can you guys help me choose, by sharing your opinions? THANK YOU!

Can I Shout Out Everything Now?

right now I am a heap of emotional mess...


so please bear with whatever I write here, because I really need to get this all off my chest...





Why do I stare at random objects at random times,

because I'm guilty of hiding secrets and deceptions,

because I'm thinking of what is, what was, and what will happen...



Many know me as a mild mannered, silent, composed, individualist.

What many don't know is that I just care for my own ends... selfish...



I let people use me like a doormat, I let myself be stepped on because I don't fight...

I am a wallflower in a person's life, insignificant, but a bug in a windshield...



I feel so purposeless that I let myself be expendable.



I have many friends, many great friends...

and yet I find myself alone most of the time...



I am but immature, unlovable, and a slave to my own rules...



I have been raised not to take my chances,

so chances have been passing by all my life,

too scared to break the rules, and too scared to break my bones...



people have mocked me at almost every step of my way, I act indifferent,

but every little thing is a big gash too much to bear...



I have been a great actor everyday,

playing smiles, when all I felt was hate,

saying "I'm fine", when I truly meant "help me"



how did I truly love another, when I did not truly love myself...

how did I love myself then, when all I did was throw myself away....



...

...

...

call me emotional if you want... I just want this out... I want the world to know....

most importantly I want my friends to know how I really feel inside...

If you are reading this right now, it is either:

-you're a friend of mine, who took some of their own time just to read this...

or

-you have randomly stumbled upon my blog, and now you probably think I need some form of theraphy... (you're probably right! HAHAHAH!)

either way... THANK YOU!

-

Others say F.M.L. (f*ck my life)

but I should say,

F.M.L. (Fix My Life)

-kens...

Tinamaan...

Ok... free-time... :

I feel so shaken, and yet so vigorous?

I don't know...
maybe its the coming events...
the shocking revelations people just discovered recently...
or the fact that every time you try to do something good, you end up being ridiculed for doing the right thing...

that last one still gets me wounded up... personally.

if you know me, you know i'm the kind of person who just sits still and watches the events taking place in front of me...
so the situation at hand...
I found it too hard to bear any longer...
I tried to be hero and just reacted on an impulsed instinct to stop the senseless hurting...

the injustice here...

they did stop...
but transferred their attention to me...

"oh look the hero! the hero whose duty is to protect those who are harmed"

All that, just because I stopped them from performing their "act of friendship" with the person concerned...

it was one of those situations where my selfcontrol is being tested...
it was one of those situations where another person would've just thrown a punch and be done with it...

but me? I just kept silent... bloodlust tempting me to just follow the urge...
o how I both hate and love that urge, I want to just let it lose!

but I don't... which is good... although it is scaring that I should remain a push-over when it comes to those kinds of things...

anyway... my bottom line is...

"why does society have to be so evil?"

ok... now that that's out of my system... man that was a long awkward rant... XD

...

I will share a story now... a part of a love story that hits me right in the face... :D XD :

the girl asked the boy, "why me?"

the boy just stood silent and looked into the distance,

and then the girl asked again, "answer the question, why me?"

and then the boy finally answered, "I don't know, I don't know why."

they both stood silent

until the boy broke the silence and faced the girl, and said,

"I don't know why, but I do know that I was aimless, I was lost, I was desperate to leave.

One day, when everything was too much to bear, I was crying then, I prayed to God,

God help me, help me decide on my path, show me the way, show me the light.

The after a while, I chose to stay against my own better judgement.

Then the day came that I returned to stay, thats when you came along.

That day, God answered my prayer,

I asked God to show me a light to guide me in the darkest nights of my life,

He showed me you."

after that they both stood silent and the boy continued.

"Its been many months since then, and there were times I didn't know what to feel, I honestly wanted to give up and move on. There were times that I was beginning to lose whatever it was that I feel, and then you do something that reminded me of the first time I noticed you. There were times that we were apart for a long time, and yet every day that I don't see you, the more that I think about you."

I'll stop here, its too loooooong! XD

wondering what happens next?

SECRET!!! :P

waw... is it just me or is this post just one of my longest posts ever!!! :D

-kens...

Its been fun... The Twist(s) in my story...

*boink!
wassup with my title?
the album by secondhand serenade... I just added the "(s)"
*no it does not entail emoness... *ok maybe a little...
But its just fitting for the moment...

Well its been 2 months since my last post and I bet no one missed me... XD

Like I said before Does anyone read this? (I have not idea, seriously!)
hahahahahah!

Why did I post today?
well the question is...

"why didn't I post something for two months?"

answer: "projects! TONS of it!"

-I had to finish the filipino thesis

-Procastinated from making my math project... (which, as it seems, was never returned to me... 99 na kaya ako dun?!?!)

-Finish my physics project... (It was an EPIC FAIL! due to the "EXCELLENT" output of my current camera... A.K.A. my phone) (X_x)

-Oh and remember me mentioning about an english thesis that was forgotten by time?
It wasn't...

need I mention more? (I won't! my head is exploding already! hahahahah)


so thats why I didn't post anything for 2 months...



"why am I posting now?"

first of, because I'm bored...
secondly, because I have a lot of things to unload...

ITS MARCH! WE"RE GRADUATING!
LIFE AS I (WE) KNOW IT, IS CHANGING!

*pants...

I haven't train for the month of february! My cardio has suffered a heavy blow again...

College? I passed 2 colleges... Waitlisted(but passed) in ateneo, passed (and not waitlisted) in la salle...

College in dublin?
SHET! I DON"T WANT TO GO! BUT I HAVE TO! I MUST! FOR A BETTER FUTURE!
But I'd have to leave everyone... people I know and love...
I was never expecting to graduate from san beda, not hating it... ( I always thought it was a hellhouse, at least for the first 2 years)
But thats all changed now... I don't want to leave... The twist in my story... (*toinks!)

hahahahah...

anyway...

I'll take this opportunity (if anyone I know is reading this):

"WHOEVER YOU ARE...

THANK YOU FOR BEING IN MY LIFE!"

on a completely random note:

what if someone loved you...

you went separate lives...

and then, 7 long years later...

nothing changed for that person...

that person never broke contact with you, always tried to be friend, and some such....

how would you feel for such a person? (as I've said, random...)

now, I almost forgot!

my long lost best friend just returned to PH from Neatherland(s?)

for good... atleast until he goes to college... (3 years from now probably)

now the twist of faith here is... it might be my turn to leave... XD

thats enough for tonight my laptop is on battery power and its dying...

=)) (X_x)

-kens...

share ko lang:

"Kaya sa pakikisama sa mga mahal natin sa buhay,

habang naririyan pa sila,

kailangan natin ikasiya ang bawat

SEGUNDO, MENUTO, AT ORAS

na kasama natin sila.

Sapagkat, baka magsisi na lang tayo at matauhan na isang araw,

wala na pala sila sa ating piling,

saka lang tayo manghihinayang at magsisisi"

-someone...

mensahe ko sa nagsulat nito...

-"oo nga naman..."

-"ayaw ko manghinayang at magsisi..."

Yesterday was oblivion... Today is a present...

Yesterday was but a dream...

Tomorrow is but a vision...

But Today is a present...

ok so it's not word for word...
but i'm sure ALMOST anyone who passed 3rd year should know about this...

Today is a present...
and so is this very moment...

"oh look at that... that last second just passed..."

(X_x)

its been a long time since I posted...
its not like anyone would bother reading about my random ramblings...
(except for two occasions)

anywhoo...
I just had a rockin' month (and a half)...
Physics project
Filipino Thesis (GGGGGRRRRRR)
and an english thesis that our teacher might have forgotten about (YEY!)

Right now I'm in malaysia...
This would be the first time I'd be spending Christmas in another country...
Frankly... I like Christmas back home...
it's just a holiday for people around here... (heck... A ONE DAY HOLIDAY FOR WORKING PEOPLE)

its not a celebration of anythings... its just a holiday in a caledar...

I have to understand though... I'm not in a christian country... (this explains a lot of things)

I miss PH (Philippines)right now...
but you know... FAMILY FIRST :))

But despite the holidays... there's always that project that you have to work on...
MATH PROJECT!!!

now I can't be complaining... it would've been easier if I were back home...
Atleast I had the guts to try and ask a Singaporean Engineer for an interview...

!!!!! oh look!!!! singaporean very busy... :((

Awell I'll just have to stick with filipino engineers and my dad...
at least I got interviews when I get back... hehehehehe... :))

the the point is...
I STILL HAVE FRIKKIN' WORK DURING THE HOLIDAYS!

and that concludes my ranting for today... Its like SUPER late...

-Kenneth...

p.s. lets just say that the days are passing way too quickly for my liking...

Its been a year since then...

hay... september's coming to an end... so many memories...
so many moments... hahahaha...

september's a very magical month isn't it?

its like everyone had something going on...
tempers rose...
hahahaha... my friends are scared... I was biting their heads off during almost every lunch time...

sorry guys...

hehehe...

on other news... SECTION 42 WON ECO-SONGFEST!

2ND PLACE VIDEO (live performance still to be held! 1st place anyone?)




GO PHYSCI!!! FOR THE WIN!


yeah!!!

play presentation is over... dramafest is on october... I'LL JOIN PRODTEAM AGAIN!
despite the excessive "PRODUCTIVENESS" that I (and other people) would experience...

ugh... I have one important question...

WHY DO WE HAVE TO MAKE TESES!? ( I think thats plural for thesis)

I mean, I can see the purpose of it, but why is it required for everyone!?

:( JOIN THE ANTI-THESIS MOVEMENT!!):

MWAHAHAHAHAHAH!


I've been running on coffee power for too long...
Its time I fixed that... must sleep as early as possible!

school, taekwon-do, other randomly appearing stuff... but only limited time...
gggggggrrrrr...

I'm getting eye-"sacks" na...


oh! and I seem to have "forgotten" to write my spiritual experience for cve today...

awell tomorrows another day... I still have to think of something to write... *sigh...


...

I was ranting again wasn't I?

thank you for reading! I've just know that people are actually read this thing... hehehehe...

I just hope I don't find myself accidentally sleeping on the floor again... its already late...


night!

-kenneth, ken-ken, kens...

(Its been a year since then,
Since the time I whispered in your ear...
And nothing has changed...)

by the way I was reading orpheus and eurydice earlier... I hope you like it...
http://www.vcu.edu/engweb/webtexts/eurydice/eurydicemyth.html

enjoy!